Last night laying in bed, God reminded me of all my fresh produce, cucumbers, tomatoes, squash, zucchini, onions, corn, peaches, I had laying on my counter and refrigerator. He made me think about how they were formed from a small seed.
Someone, a farmer, decided to take a seed and plant. After planting, he watered, he chopped, he took care of them. The farmer decided his purpose in life was to plant seeds and provide produce. He provides produce to give people food. The people eating the food really never realize the farmers purpose was to plant seeds and give them food.
So many things start as a seed or an embryo or something very tiny and grow into a beautiful thing. Just like God’s plan and plan and purpose for you.
God has a plan for each of us. God has a purpose for each of us. You are not here by accident. Just like the farmer’s purpose is to take the seeds, plant them, and farm them for us to eat, YOU have a plan.
So here comes the honesty and the hard part – get ready.
How do we find our plan or purpose?
There are two ways I’m going to talk about, praying and reading.
First we must pray to God. If we want to talk to God, He likes for us to pray and talk to Him. Now here is the honesty part. I do pray. It seems like all day I’m sending a prayer up for a friend, news, or something I feel on my heart. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS KIND OF PRAYER. Praying all day, praying while you drive it’s okay.
The praying I’m talking about is the 40 days in the wilderness praying. (Now you may not be a wilderness or camping girl – me either – I stay in my camper.) What I mean is if Jesus went in the wilderness to pray, if He went alone to a quiet place to pray all night, maybe the popcorn prayers need to be more.
I’m guilty of not falling on my knees and just praying to God with everything I’ve got more often. I can do it when life has thrown a bus at me, but when I have a tomato thrown, I just think the small prayers will work.
This week I’ve felt God telling me, He needs more of me. He needs more than the popcorn seeds. He needs the mustard seed. He wants me to spend more quality, quiet time with Him. When He talked to me last night in bed for what seem like hours, I knew I had to answer.
I’ll tell you the answer in a few, please hold on.
Secondly, reading His Word. This year I have started something and it’s July and I’m still doing it. I’m not saying I haven’t missed some days and had to catch up because life happens but I’m doing the 365 Day Chronological Bible Plan on the Bible App. (If you haven’t downloaded this app, it’s the one app you need to download.) This is great. I’m learning about the His Word.
But last night He made me realize, He wants more than just the plan. He wants more than just me reading a book in a Bible Study. He wants more of me in HIS Word. And why? Why do you think He gave us the Bible? So we could read about His life and the lives of people just like you and me that were called to spread His Word. He wants us to read their trials and tribulations. Even though it’s not 58 BC or year 30, the world is the same then as it is in 2019.
Now I’m sorry if I’m rambling and this may be the longest post I’ve ever written, because it was a long night. I should have done it last night but I didn’t.
If you know me or have followed me, you know that as of 2011 I was diagnosed with RA and then in 2013 I had to stop working. If you knew me then, you knew I was Type A personality, always on the go, always doing something, had to be in everything. It was a major adjustment. I went to Church, I prayed, I read the Bible some. But not until I started walking in the desert, did I realize how much I didn’t know of the Word. How much I didn’t read the Bible like He wanted me to. I did’t pray like God wanted me to pray.
It’s took years and guess what, I still get it wrong a lot. I know I will never get it perfect! I know I will fail again. But that’s okay. I’ll get back up and do it again. God’s Grace!
Being at home while Dalton was in school was so much easier. I could stay busy. As long as I’m busy, I would have a checklist. I would right down many things to do and it seems when I’m busy, I’m more apt to get it done. I’m more apt to feel like I’m doing something – got a purpose. But now he is gone to college, it’s harder. They don’t need us as much – they are finding their life. (I know I have wrote about all this before, so I’m not going there today. You will have to check out other posts about that.)
So after a few months of him being at college and of binge watching TV, trying to find things to keep me busy, trying to keep myself happy, trying to keep everyone else happy, trying to survive, letting life happen, sickness, surgeries, I feel like I’m in a rut.
So how do I get out of the rut.
Well in January after joining a 12 week Mastermind Group (which you need to read more about – its awesome), I felt God leading me to a plan, a purpose. Let me restate that. I wanted to complete something. I’m bad for starting things and starting out great. I’m great at as long as it keeps me busy and even if things aren’t always going good. Sometimes I just stop because I lose interest. Sometimes I just stop because well I don’t know why (that’s another post).
I’m going to complete something. So I decided I would go back to school in August and finishing getting my Bachelor’s Degree.
Why not? I have the time. I could finally complete something.
So I did it. And for several weeks I was on a high. So excited. Getting ready to go back to school. Enrolled, met with Financial Aid, signed up for classes. I’m ready.
But then there is the wait. There is the time before I start. I’m back in the lull again.
Now I do try to stay busy, washing clothes, cooking, running errands, visiting friends and family, going to my happy place. I also volunteer for an online organization, P31 OBS, that saved my life in 2013. I found it before I stopped working. It helped me so much to do the online study since it was hard to actually attend studies. And then in 2014, God nudged me with the help of a wonderful friend in Christ who lives in another state, to join as a volunteer.
Rambling again – sorry. I know people think that an Online Bible Study what? You are not sitting beside anyone. But let me tell you, I feel like the friendships I have made with people, some I’ve not met, some I’ve met before and after volunteering, some that are in other states, some in other countries and some I shared a room with at a conference, are as important to me as my friends who live down the road or that I have lunch with. So yes, you make think Online Bible Studies are not as personal, but I have proof they are!
Rambling over for now.
Please don’t stop reading. I promise the ending is WORTH IT AND NOT FAR OFF! (Maybe I should have done a FB Live instead 🙂 )
Here is the hard part and what I heard God saying last night.
This has been a hard week for several reasons I do not care to go into detail about but I have learned that the hard weeks are the easiest weeks to hear from God. Oh was He talking last night…….
I’ve got to get out of my lull and funk. I’ve got to realize that just because I am not working a job that pays money or I get up and go to, I can do other things. I need to stop trying to binge watch every show. I need to stop trying to get my house perfect (because that takes time, energy and money and I only have one of those). I need to stop playing games on my phone.
I NEED TO STOP DOING AND PLANT MY SEED!
I know the first thing your thinking – I hear it a lot. Go volunteer somewhere, church, hospital, somewhere. And all those are great things. I do volunteer – remember by P31 OBS that I absolutely love and believe wholeheartedly God wants me there. It has grown me in ways I could never imagined. I have wished a million times, that the things I have learned since 2014 I would have known 10, 15, or 20 years ago. I believe I could have made better decisions but maybe that wasn’t my plan or purpose. Or maybe I wasn’t listening! And maybe God does have a plan for me to volunteer somewhere else or broaden my horizons like going back to school.
But here is where I go back to the beginning of the post after a lot of rambling, praying and reading.
It may be what God wants me to do, but first I must pray and read to make sure. I need to lay everything out for Him and let Him direct me.
But I have a HUGE problem. And this is where I’m going for this post finally. (I’m going to elaborate on some things I put in this post in a different post later.)
WHAT? We all hear this everywhere. But I heard it day before yesterday mowing grass and I heard it again last night so I’m thinking it’s time to listen.
When phones were designed what were they designed for?
To call people.
Over the years, technology has made phones so easy to run your life right from the phone. I’m not even going to get into people dropping their land lines, and sending mail – that is for sure another post. But our phones have become our life. And it’s okay – to an extent.
The phone helps me do my volunteer work for P31 OBS. My phone helps me share on Social Media and reach out to others and share God’s Word. Some people do think Social Media is the devil. I actually believe God gave the designers the plan and purpose for this. I believe He saw another way to share His Word and reach so many more people. He had people design Bible Apps so we can have the Bible at our fingertips whenever we need it. So it can’t all be bad.
BUT, when we depend on the phone to be our life line and not God, that’s when our world can get out of control. We scroll. We read. We cry. We laugh. We are astonished. We can get all our entertainment for one night with five minutes on social media.
I have let my phone take control over me. YES I JUST ADMITTED THAT! (I hope my husband isn’t reading this and please don’t tell him.)
I have an anxiety attack if I can’t find it. Now with that being said it could be because if I’m at home I have no land line and what if someone needs me or I need them……. Well what did we do when we had land lines and it was busy or they were not home. We called someone else or we called back. No problem.
I have to keep a check on Social Media to see what everyone else is doing. Does it matter what they are doing? Before this we found out by talking to them, or seeing them in town, or writing them a letter or a card. I do think being able to see family members who may not live here, keep up with your friends or co-workers lives and accomplishments, and keep up with your friends children’s and accomplishments is a great thing but it can also be a bad thing (another post in the making).
This statistic I found is alarming and eye-opening.
People are on their phones about 4 hours a day. And of that 4 hours, 2 hours and 22 minutes is spent on social networking or messaging platforms.
I know that iPhones have some program that can tell you how much time you spend on your phone weekly. I REFUSE TO LOOK AT IT. I’m sure mine is twice of the statistic.
Now if I’m doing it for good stuff, sharing God’s Word, motivating people, praying for people it can be good. But we all know we are not doing that all the time. We all know we are reading and comparing and doubting. Yes we begin doing it for the good, but then that dang devil steps in with the comparison and junk.
A podcast I listened to the other day through P31 OBS, Suzie Eller was speaking at a conference and said she felt God calling her to take a break from Social Media. Now she is a famous Christian writer, Blogger, Speaker, and she tried to find all the reasons not to, but God wouldn’t let her. She did it! And guess for how long. 1 MONTH!!!
I thought about that. It blew my mind. But guess what. She survived. Her career survived. And because of taking this time off, she probably was able to touch more ladies the next few months than she would have if she had not taken the time.
So I’m not doing a month!!! I’m doing a smaller chunk.
I’m taking the weekend, Friday, Saturday, & Sunday – no phone except for calling and texting.
I’m going to miss posting my Bible App Verse Images every morning, but it will be okay. I’m going to miss looking at all the pictures of peoples summer adventures. I’m probably not going to miss all the bad stuff and drama though. I will let my peeps know within the volunteer organization that I will be doing this because they have so much Grace and support us in everything. But I will survive. I will get through the 3 days.
I do believe God is trying to help me find my Plan and Purpose in Life.
I do believe God is trying to tell me something and unless I stop something and start praying and reading more I will never hear Him. I will never be able to complete my Plan & Purpose.
So back to how I started with the produce and seeds……
I believe I have been allowing my phone to be my seed and my only seed.
I feel my seed of my plan and purpose may not have been producing and growing as God wanted because of my phone that I was letting me a thorn or a rock.
I feel the seeds I should be growing to allow God’s plan and purpose have been thwarted by the seed I have allowed to take over.
As the parable goes about seed planted on rocks, sand, or in the thorns, the seeds can not grow appropriately. I believe it’s time for my seed to be planted in the correct soil so God’s purpose and plan for my life can blossom into the beautiful creation He has for me.
Do you think you could go without your phone for 3 days?
Have you ever tried it?
Why not try it with me? I would love to pray for you while we take this journey together and find out how beautiful are seeds can be.
Please feel free to comment here, email me or PM on social media if you want to join me. BUT DO IT TODAY! I’m going in the dark as of tomorrow……… And maybe I will get me some sleep!